They Told Her to Remove Her Uterus. She Found Another Way

Eight out of ten Black women will have fibroids by the time they turn 50.

Read that again.

That's not a rare diagnosis. That's not a fluke. That's most of us.

And yet so many women find out they have fibroids the same way Charlene Modeste did: alone, dismissed, and told to just deal with it.

On this episode of Hold My Purse, Charlene sat down with me and told the whole story. The heavy bleeding that took her out for days at a time. The myomectomy that didn't hold. The doctor who offered a hysterectomy as if it were no big deal. And the moment she said no and went looking for another way instead.

The Numbers Nobody Told Us

Let's talk facts for a second, because the stats on fibroids are wild and most of us were never given them.

Somewhere between 70% and 80% of all women will develop fibroids by age 50. That's according to research out of Kaiser Permanente, one of the largest studies of its kind. Fibroids are that common. And still, most of us grew up never hearing the word until we were sitting in an exam room getting the news.

For Black women, the numbers hit different. We're diagnosed roughly three times more often than white women. We tend to get diagnosed about three years younger. Our symptoms tend to be more severe. And even with less invasive treatment options on the table, Black women are still about twice as likely to end up with a hysterectomy.

Here's another one that stopped us both in our tracks while we were talking: fibroids cost the U.S. healthcare system an estimated $34 billion a year. Billion. And about half of all fibroids show no symptoms at all, which means a lot of women are walking around with them and don't even know it yet.

So no, this isn't just a "women's issue" tucked away in a pamphlet somewhere. This is a public health story. And it's one that's been quietly shaping the lives of the women closest to you.

When the System Looks the Other Way

Charlene didn't have insurance for a lot of the years she was dealing with this. No access. No safety net. Just her body, changing in front of her, and a medical system that wasn't built to catch her.

But here's the thing about Charlene. She's funny. She's sharp. And instead of staying quiet about it, she turned the whole experience into a one-woman show called She's About to Pop: An Immaculate Misconception.

She talks about finding research on plant medicine. About traveling to Northern California chasing an answer nobody in her regular life could give her. About cannabis triggering something called apoptosis, which is basically the process where damaged cells clear themselves out of the body. And about watching her fibroids shrink because she refused to accept the first answer she was handed.

This wasn't magic. It was Charlene deciding that she got to be the expert on her own body, even when the people with medical degrees weren't listening.

What This Episode Is Really About

If you've ever sat across from a doctor and felt small, this episode is for you.

If you've ever been told your pain is normal, that it's just part of being a woman, that you should push through it, this episode is for you.

If you've ever needed permission to say "actually, no" to a treatment plan that didn't sit right, pull up a seat.

Charlene's story isn't just about fibroids. It's about what happens when a woman decides to trust herself first. It's about advocacy. It's about grief and healing living in the same body at the same time. And honestly, it's about finding the humor in a situation that could easily break you if you let it.

We laughed a lot during this conversation. We also got quiet a few times, because some of what Charlene shared needed room to land.

Before You Hit Play

Ask yourself this: when was the last time you dismissed something your own body was trying to tell you, because someone else's opinion felt louder than your own?

Sit with that question while you listen. You might be surprised what comes up.

This one is for every woman who has been dismissed, misdiagnosed, or told to just push through the pain. Press play, and pass it on to someone who needs to hear it. Check out the episode Cannabis Shrunk My Fibroids & My Doctor Still Wasn't Listening ft. Charlene Modeste

Connect with Charlene Modeste 🌐 charlenemodeste.com 📲 Instagram: @charlenemodeste

She's About to Pop: An Immaculate Misconception Written and performed by Charlene Modeste July 11th | Barbara Morrison Performing Arts Center | Leimert Park, Los Angeles July is Fibroids Awareness Month. Buy Tickets

Before You Go

If this hit somewhere real for you — share it. Not for the algorithm. For the woman in your life who has been holding everything together and hasn’t had a single person ask her how she’s actually doing.

She needs this. Send it.

And if you haven’t listened to the full episode yet, pull it up. There’s a moment with my granddaughter Aria in there that will stop you in your tracks. Because sometimes the clearest wisdom comes from the smallest people who haven’t learned yet to shrink themselves.

And if you’re ready to nurture your healing journey even further, check out the Love Yourself Journal and the Mastering Self-Care series — designed to help you rise, reflect, and reclaim your peace one day at a time. Download the free 15-Minute Self-Care Ritual

✨ You deserve a life that feels like home within yourself.

If this post hit home, subscribe to the podcast, hit the notifications, and share this with a woman who’s ready to follow through on herself.

Until next time — be gentle with yourself. Put down what's heavy. Stay aligned. Stay unbothered.

And hold your own damn purse. ✨

Sending you love and light,

Rho